Nicole Callihan
The Visits
Matt came, we took a walk, and him maybe, a nap,
pills. I asked things how does it feel to be the way you are?
And he answered, okay, I’m trapped somehow in my mind.
Loops, you know. I know loops, yes. We went to
the beach. Sand. The farmer’s market. Mushrooms.
Oyster. Clumps of weed. The sky being the sky.
Disappointment. An anointment. That loop too.
I disappoint. I’ve been disappointed,
find it all so very disappointing. The meal, uncomely,
weak, so very salty, but without flavor. I said,
so very salty, but what else is there? What else
is there, is there anything else? He said, nothing,
nothing, he said, I said, I think you’ll be okay. I think
about crying, about those sudden outbursts, that winter
when I didn’t die, I didn’t die, again and again,
I was still alive, he came and sat with me on the bed,
on the edge, he said, on the edge of the bed, and he said,
you’ll be okay, I have to believe you’ll be okay.
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Winner of the 2023 Tenth Gate Prize and a 2023 Alma Award, Nicole Callihan has two recent poetry collections: chigger ridge (The Word Works 2024) and SLIP (Saturnalia 2025). Other books include This Strange Garment (Terrapin 2023) and the 2019 novella, The Couples. Her work has appeared in The Kenyon Review, Tin House, Conduit, The American Poetry Review and as a Poem-a-Day selection from the Academy of American Poets. Find out more at www.nicolecallihan.com.